outside my palace walls

i sat on the steps, facing the blank wall which went around the compounds of Kuala Lumpur Gospel Hall (KLGH). that wall was tall, tall enough so that i could not see what was on the other side even when i stood at the top of those steps.

it was like that wall separated two worlds: the peaceful church grounds and the broken world outside on the streets of KL.

i sat there reflecting for a bit on the things i’d been exposed to the past few days; the refugees, the poor, the homeless. i thought about how we found it so irksome that the water got cut off before we could finish washing up the dishes, when clean running water was something many who were poor had no access to. the irony.

i thought about how my life was so comfortable. the roof over my head, the love of family and friends, more than enough food on our tables, pocket money i did not have to slave for, gadgets, the list goes on. my comfortable palace.

that morning’s devotion was about Queen Esther and what Mordecai said to her, “Don’t think for a moment that you will escape there in the palace when all other Jews are killed.” (Esther 4:13)  it was a message from Mordecai to not be indifferent to what happened outside those walls because it would affect her too. it was about how Esther was in a place of comfort yet she still had a role to play in saving the people outside of her palace.

i am 21 years old. all my life i’ve been sheltered, loved and cared for, protected. i’ve never had to fight for food or runaway for my life. but i need to remember, ‘it could be me’.

i thought to myself how ignorant and indifferent i had been to everything around me. SWEEP really opened my eyes. the real world was a very broken one.

i sat on the steps, the high walls before me.

picture taken from http://weheartit.com/entry/11076207

have i built walls around me that keep the unpleasant things of the world out of sight? that cause me not to see, not to know the pain behind these walls?

Lord, tear down these walls I’ve built.
Take me outside of these palace walls.
Use me in this broken world,
to make a difference – one life at a time.

SWEEP : Social Work Exposure & Embracement Program 2011 (6th-19th June 2011)

priceless

the past one month plus since exams ended have been very eventful. starting with three weeks spent with the other PP’s (Pembantu Pelajar) otherwise know as orientation helpers.

the experience and relationships built were simply priceless and so very precious.

the first week of training was one that was bitter sweet. i remember asking if i had made the right decision to spend my holidays doing this. and i remember clearly what God said, “Give it your best.”

i remember the late nights and early mornings. the constant soundings the seniors gave us. but we got through that and it taught us all to work together as a team and our friendships grew stronger.

the outdoor camp, for me, was when everyone really bonded, helped and aided each other. being thrown into a whole new environment was really great to help us learn that we needed each other. some were better in this and some were better in that. in the end, we all came together as one.

the second week was our gerak kerja week. lots of work and preparations to be done for the coming orientation week. it was a lot more chilled and laid back as compared to the training week. and the amount of choki choki we consumed is mad! did a lot of dancing and cheering that week too. oh, i sprained my ankle too and had to go to a chinese doctor who rubbed and pulled it. i almost lost my purse too in all the drama but thank God for kind hearted people who found it and returned it .

as for orientation week, i was only there for half the week. cause i had a flight to Bali. but for the first half, it was a lot of early mornings and late nights again. and there was a lot a lot of students to handle! can’t remember but if i’m not wrong 900+? the hall was packed like a sardine can. didn’t really get to know many of them as i left pretty early. but the little bits of orientation that i was involved in, i enjoyed very much. oh, and i was part of the Biro Kesenian (or was it Kebudayaan?).

the PP’s also had a trip to langkawi after orientation week. unfortunately, it clashed with SWEEP 2011. (which will be another story to tell )

we’ll be having another orientation coming up when the undergraduates come in in september. let’s see how that goes.

these people, memories and experiences were simply priceless. and i really thank God for allowing our paths to cross. I thank God for telling me to give it my best from the start and that truly gave the whole thing a lot of meaning and purpose.

love you all banyak-banyak *HUGS*

endure, enduring, endured, endures, endurance, end.

what i’ve learned over the past two semesters of my first year in uni…LOTS!

i’ve learned to endure hardships and that hardships are a form of discipline from the one who loves me.

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?

-Hebrews 12:7

i’ve learned that i must continue enduring whatever comes my way and that God will give me the strength i need and because it builds faith and love for one another.

i’ve learned that i’ve endured a lot of consequences from my last minuteness and lousy management skills. i must learn from that.

i’ve learned that despite it all, God’s love endures forever.

Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good.
His love endures forever.

-Psalm 136:1

and this is my hope to keep on enduring - Him who endured it all for me.

² Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. ³ Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinful man, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

-Hebrews 13:2-3

i’ve learned that endurance is more than just sticking through something. it’s what keeps you going, pressing forward, persevering when everything is coming against you from every direction. endurance is what carries you to the end, to the finishing line.
endure, until the end.

*notice i’m doing a little alphabet challenge here on my own?
coming up: F! i’m thinking maybe something on faith? forgiveness? friends? future? failures? feelings? or maybe, facebook?

storycorps

storycorps was introduced to me by Yew Kong. and i remember watching this video and tearing in front of my brother Yew Meng who then teased me for crying :(

I couldn't remember what was the name of their youtube channel and could not find it for myself after that. today, it was at the side of my youtube window and i watched a few and i watched the one above again and - cried. haha. such a emo girl :|

i'm sharing with you cause it's touching. go watch the rest. :)

♥

ducks

12th college is doing some work on the ponds we have between the girls’ and guys’ hostel blocks. And the best thing about that is they’ve added some ducks and geese to the pond too!  

Li Fen and I decided to go for a walk around the pond after lunch to see the new pets our college has. And she said, “12th college is like a farm now.” We’ve got cats, chickens, a rooster, and now ducks and geese!

`I’ll try to get some pictures of the ducks and geese.

There are four brown ducks and they always stick together. Always. They swim together, wade about together, clean themselves together.

And then there’s about seven white geese. They stick together too but not as much as the ducks. They’re super adorable when crossing the wooden plank. Hop hop hop.

But the ducks and the geese don’t mix with each other. I’m not sure why.

Okay, just some random rants at midnight about life here in uni. One more paper and then I’m done with first year!