Saturday, September 29, 2012

the non-stop zone

it's already been three weeks of semester, or should i say, it's only been three weeks into the semester... and things have been going on back to back.

i call this the "non-stop zone".

for me as a university student, it usually comes at the end of the semester with the crazy assignment datelines all packed together or when the lecturers all seem to conspire to have tests the same week.

i think non-stop zones are pretty dangerous though :\ if we're not careful.

there's this thing called "burn out" or the more ganas term "crash and burn"
where you just keep running and running till you reach empty.

been there. and it's horrible. 

having people to encourage you and to focus on the right stuff really saves you from burning out. being reminded that it's not by our own strength and abilities we do the things we do, but it is by God's grace and strength we persevere on. and i am thankful for such people in my life.

there's also the "workaholic" syndrome.
where all you do and focus on is - work. you just go from one task to the next, to the next, to the next. it's pretty easy to get caught up in work in the non-stop zone. and it's scary, cause you may sometimes lose sight of the things that matter (like taking relationships and people's needs for granted) or even the purpose of why you're doing something. 

been here too. and it's not a good place to be in.

we do need to take those pauses every now and then, to check whether we're just going through the motions to the point we lose sight and the meaning of living

i think momentum is good, but having the right fuel and drive is even more important. in the midst of crazy busy times, it's even more crucial that we have those times where we just sit at the feet of Jesus like how Mary did, just enjoying and dwelling in the presence of our Lord. it's through these encounters we find refreshment and refuge in Him.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.
Psalm 91:1-2

i pray that no matter how busy we get, that we will always know that our lives have a very great purpose in God. it is more than the work we do or the datelines we have to meet, it is more than our activities and programs, more than the projects and assignments. our lives are meant for so much more, the only kind of life that is truly fulfilling and that really counts is a life lived unto the Lord according to what God calls us to. and that is a life worth living :) and i believe, it is exciting!

may you find refuge and strength in God even as you go through your non-stop zones.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

coffee moments

so, i've developed a thing since Camp Camerons to go for coffee on my Sabbath day (usually Sundays), on my own, with my bible and journal, and go on a date with God :) it's been pretty insightful, to look back on the week and chit chat with God about the things that happened, what made me happy, what broke my heart, what distracted me, what was my focus, what i learned, finding out what He thinks, or what He wants me to change and to do, seeking His perspective and His will, etc. i come back a lot more refreshed and orientated for the coming days.

this morning, i looked back on my past three months of break. and it's crazy how time has just flies by. this Monday, i start my first semester of my third year :| a new phase in university, new responsibilities, new challenges, new lives, new relationships, etc. but i look back and i do thank God very much for the old and for the things that have been happening.

this holidays began with PKVUM's CPR in Joanne's house in Melaka with the whole committee (Timothy, Joanne, Noah, Joyce, Abbie, Sarah, Philemon, Deborah, Daniel Hiew, Daniel Wong, Tien Mie) and our FES staff, Swee Kit and David.

we makan makan makan, went to jongker's street, ribut otak (brainstormed) for themes and objectives and for the coming semester ahead, we worshiped, prayed, shared and played :) it was a good time of getting to know each other, bonding and learning to work together as a team, as a family.

then Camp Camerons 2012 - Give me life in Thy ways.

lots of unforgettable moments with the people at this camp. three weeks of being at this "bus stop" where we did a stop and check of our lives. learned a lot about myself (the good and the bad) but even more than that once again experiencing the unconditional love and abounding grace of God.

a start of something new with a very special someone by the name of Ernest Lee.

meet Ernest :) 
he couldn't resist that single promo :P hahahaha (just kiddingg..)

an adventure over at Deborah's beautiful land below the wind, Sabah. with Lydia and Brandon. lovely times with lovely people. :)

a two days escapade and tell all journey with Sue Ann to Melaka. went down to visit Sue Ann's grandma who is the cutest and funniest grandma i've met :) had tons of melaka goodness - chicken rice ball under the tree, cendol, ice cream, etc. am going to miss this girl as she begins her journey as an undergraduate in USM, Penang. take care over there, dear.

weddings and weddings :) Daniel & Nie Nie and Reuben & Lisa. ngaaawwwww :)

daniel and nie nie :) 

reuben and lisa :)

also, have been meeting up with different groups of friends and spending more time with my family. and it's made me more appreciative of the people i have in my life.

i learned many things about myself these holidays. a lot of character flaws, ugly sides, and so on. things i need to work on, change, throw out, refine. all under God's grace and mercy. being transformed by the work of the Holy Spirit as i come before Him in surrender. having Ernest in my life has also taught me a lot about trust and truth, taught me more about loving one another.

i am so humbled by the grace and love shown to me by others. by the ones who have been hurt by me over the years, but who choose to forgive and still love me. i know i've lost some people along the way, and that i do regret :( i am grateful for those who give me the plain truth, even though it hurts and stings, but like bitter medicine, it's for the better. a lot of times i don't know how to go on with the relationship after that, but i guess character changing and refining isn't usually a quick instant thing but a process of making a conscious effort to change. i ask God to fill me with His love and grace that i may be able to love and care for others like how He does.

so, this has been the holiday journey and as i prepare myself for another semester ahead, i am excited to journey with God in this, knowing that He is the author and the perfecter of my faith, of the story of my life :)

and to you out there, to my loved ones, thank you for being a part of my life, for being a part of this journey. i want to thank you and appreciate the marks and impressions you have left in my life, for making me who i am today. although very imperfect still, i am still in the process of sanctification and refining. i love you, very much.

have a blessed weekend! :)