Monday, July 30, 2012

i can do all things through Christ :)

Through Christ - Donna Lasit, Generation Unleashed

I can do all things through Christ
I can move a mountain if you
Are the strength of my life
I can do all things through Christ
If you are the strength of my life 


Give me life in Thy ways

Hello, just got back (about a week ago) from Camp Camerons 2012. And it was a really good stop and check for my own life. Met some old friends and lots of new ones too and most of all built pretty meaningful relationships with people there :) Met a lot of amazing people there, each with his and her own story to tell.

It was three weeks long! Coming back from it, I do miss the times there.

But I believe all that happened there, all I've gone through and experienced, that there's a reason for all that and that reason is so that I can go on with life wherever I am living life in His ways. That's the whole point and purpose of life, I suppose. 

I don't really know how to sum everything up in a blog post, it'll be a very very long one I foresee and that kind of makes me, uhh, avoid it. Oh, that's one thing I learnt about myself: I tend to avoid things. I really fear, dislike confrontations. But certain events at camp brought me to a place where I realized coming forth with the truth, apologies, thoughts and feelings, etc. was actually better as compared to the quiet tensions and awkwardness. It's something I've got to learn to do. To be truthful with the ones I love.

This is my family :) The Gad Family or The Gaddadites.

Really thank God for these people. We shared so much with each other over the days, got into areas of disagreements and sorts but worked it out. And I pray we continue to grow in our relationships and love for each other. Really thank God for each one. :)

Another thing I realized at camp was how I related to others. People. Lives. I think along the way, I just lost sight of how very precious each person in my life was. Along the way, I've hurt so many :( I need to learn to love all over again. To not harden my heart to others and also situations. To listen more and talk less. To love not only in words but through my actions. To care. 

I actually really enjoyed the Sabbaths there, where we went off on our own and had hours and hours of silence with God. The place we were at, Chefoo Methodist Center, was really nice. The first week I found a spot on the hills where it was mossy and quite dry, I lay there looking at the blue sky and the trees before me. It was...wahh :) The second and third Sabbaths were spent walking around a bit more. Streams, grass, walls, trees, etc. The things I discovered and talked about with God really made me see how shortsighted I had been to many things in my life.

This camp for me was a lot of redeeming, a lot of correcting and learning to live and enjoy His presence once  again. I guess as we grow older and take on more and more responsibilities, we sometimes lose that joy and ability to be still with God. I know I did. I'd gotten so used to running around, doing this and that, to a point I grew pretty tired and disillusioned. But this stop at Camp Cameron really helped me get my bearings straight again. Thank God.

I come back with this name for God - My Father. The one who created me, who knows me, who loves me, who cares and provides for me, who watches over and protects me, who guides me, who teaches me, who encourages me, who strengthens me, who comforts me, who corrects and disciplines me, who forgives me, who knows what's best for me, and who is so much more to me. This is my Father. :)

Knowing that I am the one who needs Him and not the other way around. It is by His grace and mercy, I am here today. And it is by His grace and mercy that I live each and every single day.

Lord, give me life in Your ways.

The rainbow God blessed us with on our final camp special night. It was beautiful :) A sign of God's covenant and faithfulness. Thank You, Lord, for Camp Cameron.

Monday, July 2, 2012

halfway through the year

So many things to write, to share. I don't know where to start.

I start with thanksgiving.

I thank God for bringing me through two full academic years of university. I finished my Second Semester of my Second Year on the 19th of June 2012 :) And I thank God for bringing me through. I thank God for the friends he has brought into my life along the way. The people I got to know better and who bring a little more colour into my life :)

I thank God for helping me as I served in different areas of university, whether it was JTK or PKV. Without Him, I think I would have given up long ago. I know certain things could have been better, and I do have regrets and "what if"s but I know that it was a lot of His grace and mercy all throughout. I thank God for the experience of being in JTK and for the people I got to know throughout. It wasn't easy and I found things frustrating at times. But it taught me to trust and know that God is indeed above all. PKV, has been a lot of things to me. It has been a blessing and it has also caused me to be challenged and broken in many areas. There's so much more though, and I am excited for the things God has in store for this group.

But lately (lately as in this previous week) I've been struggling. A lot of questions that seem to end up with the answer, "I don't know..." :( Yet I am very grateful for the people who have been there to listen, who have thrown me some questions to think about, who have taken the time to love me despite me being very unclear and lost :\

I'm still asking questions, still trying to figure out the answers, but what I really really really just need is for God to touch and change me. Which could mean turning my whole life inside out and upside down, but if in His hands and in His will would be the best.

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for His compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself,"The Lord is my portion;
therefore I will wait for Him."
The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him,
to the one who seeks Him;
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.
Lamentations 3:22-26

Hold on to His promises. Seek and wait upon the Lord, my dear.