Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Do Not Worry

It's 2.30am. drank coffee to stay awake to study. coffee.

so anyway, this passage really encouraged me today.

Luke 12:22-33 (Do Not Worry)
Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.

(ahh, all you people who 'live to eat' and fashionistas who thrive on the latest fashions.)

Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

"Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek first His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart is also.

how very apt for these moments before STPM and also the whole dilemma of what i'm going to do in the future. it's been quite worrying. and Jesus reminds us not to worry because our Father knows what we need and He is able to watch over us.

i say, humans tend to complicate things. we argue that we are not simple beings like ravens and lilies where we can just fly around and grow in some park. but even all this storing of material possessions and working for "success" is driven by our own human wants. wants to be better than others, wants to be in control of our lives, wants to have power, etc. when God has far greater plans for our lives. we're so valuable to Him, of course He'll take care of us!

But seek first His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.
what are we seeking for? what are chasing after? the eternal kingdom of God or the temporal treasures of the world?

i ask, whose kingdom am i seeking after? whose treasury am i storing in?
is it my own or God's?

For where your treasure is, there your heart is also.
where is my heart?

of course seeking after a kingdom that is not tangible and that is invisible to sight is not the easiest thing to do.

most people would want to touch and feel their ringgits, dollars, euros, etc. even seeing the digits in their bank accounts is tangible enough. people prefer cars, houses, jewelry, etc. compared to this "kingdom". they say, "what kingdom?"

it's faith. faith that there is a kingdom, God's kingdom. faith that we are storing our treasures there, treasures that do not perish. faith that we're not wasting our time. faith that God will provide in our lives.

Dear Lord, thank you for this reminder. thank you for providing all these years and for watching over me. thank you for your promises. thank you for giving me faith. i love you.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

light & love

yesterday was,
Yew Kong & Charity's wedding :)

time flies. too fast.
my big brother is now married.
and STPM is this week already.

but i thank God.
i thank God that He is there through every season of our lives.
through the growing up years, watching over us and shaping us to be what He wants us to be (when we let Him).
teaching us to trust and hold on to Him through the crazyy times.
the painful times.
the hopeless times.
the desperate times.

He was there and will be there.

He puts little reminders along the way,
to remind us of Him, His love and who we are in Him.
He loves us.
God loves me.
and that is what matters most.

i don't know how the post about the wedding turned into a post about God's presence in my life. hmm.

but anyway, yewkong's name means friend of light and charity's chinese name means true love.
light & love;
that's what God is to me. :)

now a little bit bigger :)

there's plenty of pictures :) but all in different cameras. will compile them together soon. i'm contemplating whether to go back on my little pledge to not facebook and just sign in to post up the pictures. hmmhmmhmm...

i don't have many of the newly-weds on this camera.
will post more up soon, promise.
but the promise has no due time in it. :P

and to miss inkkie,
Happy Sweet Sixteenth :)
you are precious and loved!
and despite them having their wedding on your birthday, i don't think they were trying to steal the limelight from you :)
*and your dress turned out purple in this picture! :D

we love you much.

i shall continue studying now.

oh, and people asking about STPM during the wedding and how my preps were coming along, was just really really potong on such a joyous occasion.
ah wells, it's a small talk thing.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

keeping sane

so, i promised not to go on facebook till stpm is over. and so far so good :)

i used to go on all in the name of "de-stressing". ending up looking through a million gazillion profiles and pictures, playing bejeweled, heh. and then realising, "ohmy! i wasted so much much much time!" :(

so, with one of my de-stress tools gone which was actually a distraction. i had to resort to something else, less time consuming yet with the same de-stressing effects :)

and i remembered what kept me sane through SPM. veggietales :) see it goes way back here.

so, today. i just watched three of my favorite ones :) teehee. i love!

it's pretty good timing. cause i come down, listen to a silly song, say to myself "times up!" and get back to the books. works pretty well and is only about five minutes at the maximum? :) i love my new de-stress tool. :D

Song of the Cebu :)

The Hairbrush Song

I Love My Lips

Pirates Who Don't Do Anything

there's a lot more :) but these are my favorite ones.
oh, silly songs are so fun!

oh, and today a few of the Youths came and i got an STPM de-stress kit. haha, kitkat, biscuits, jelly, stress balls, sweets :) and prayer and encouragement.

i love you's :) thank you very much!


Friday, November 6, 2009


today, as i sat on the steps.
i thought to myself,what am i doing?
where am i going?
am i right where God wants me to be.
or am i running by my own agenda?
is my life right before God?
or am i measuring it on my own scale?

everything's been overwhelming lately.
(heh, every time you don't know how to describe feelings and situations, categorize them under 'overwhelming'. general yet it says alot.)
yeah, life's been overwhelming.

but in the midst of it all, i question, how is my life being used by God?

Jesus was feeding the hungry, teaching the people, healing and doing miracles, driving out evil spirits. He was standing up for truth and going against the pharisees and teachers of the law. He was doing what the Father had in His heart.

so, i question. what am i doing?

am i standing up for truth, am i loving the needy, am i doing what he wants me to do?

or am i just living my days as they go by? turning my back to the people in need. judging others. keeping quiet to certain things that are not right, all in the name of tolerance, repect and the freedom of speech. letting injustice go on in front of me.

how can i? how can i break my Father's heart this way?

which steps am i walking in? whose steps am i following?

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.'
Psalm 139:23-24

seach me, O Lord.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

kids' shampoo

one day when yewmeng was bathing in the bathroom upstairs :)
we had this conversation across bathroom doors.

yewmeng | waiyan
ehh, you're using the lavender soap i bought. nice right? :)
mmm, okaylah. eh, you using the kids' shampoo ar?
yeah, but i don't like it :( nice meh?
nice...go into my eyes not pain.
can squirt into my eyes also not pain.

he's so weird.
i love him lah :)

Monday, November 2, 2009

messy genes

i know where i got my affinity for messiness from. my dad :)

was supposed to get my passport *grins* done today BUT there was a huge crowd there. so, we'll be going again tomorrow, earlier.

followed my dad to his office in UM and his office was really a mess. like a hurricane ran through or something. but i have no qualms about it, i'm kind of okay with messes.

:) i love my daddy and am glad he's home.

okay, back to the books. pfft.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

crash and burn

been running through our old songs on the computer, stuff my brother downloaded over 5 years back.

and this song played. i like it :)

Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone
- crash and burn, savage garden

videos pretty, umm, interesting :) i like.
i like his blue eyes, i like his sign-language at the end too. i like the quotes. i like the lyrics. i like this video, pretty much :) you like?

with STPM just around the corner, this song is very relate-able!

on a lighter note, daddy's back from UKland :)
after four long months. sigh :)
thank God he's home safely!

besides all that, God has been really faithful and graceful and He has some pretty awesome timing. His surprises are really timely, really timely. He sent the right people into my life at the right times.

thank You, Lord
thank You for always being with me,
every single time i crash and burn.
for breaking my fall and encouraging me to get up again.
what would i ever do without You?
i love you.

listening to savage garden songs makes me so emo :( teehee.

november's here!