where are we going?

we're so lost.

where are we going?

no map, no compass, no guide.

just a lamp and a shining light for my feet.

i got to trust, i got to trust in You.

Your word is a lamp unto my feet
and a light for my path.
Psalm 119:10

Lord, guide my way.
I trust in You.

grace amazing takes me home

this has got to be one of the longest weeks of my life.

form 6 is really being very unkind to me :(
okay, i guess it would have been better if i had studied consistently all the while.

exams are finally over! and this isn't even the real deal. next year, next year. ohboyy...

i really felt very very super duper low throughout the exams.

and the results i got back are not excellent, but i can't ask for lots of A+ if i hadn't been studying, right? oh wells. :(

but i know that God has been with me all throughout the exams and i know He'll be with me all the way. He's always been there. :)

Lord, i love you so much!
and i'll wait for You to come rescue me, in Your time.
thanks for Your amazing amazing grace in my life.
Thank You! :)

beloved

yesterday, our church had a Spiritual Formation Weekend. it was to be like a follow up from this year's church camp (which i missed because i was off on my ns adventure).

the speaker, Ps Keith Lai shared on friday night. a summary of what he shared in camp, which was really good because i got to hear a bit of what i missed at camp.

the message was about our spiritual journey with Christ and us being Christ's disciples.
Discipleship is a journey of spiritual formation.

it started of with how many people have lost our delights on this journey. how many are tired. how we end up doing things just for the sake of doing it. how we no longer enjoy the work given to us. and in the end, we just become tired, fatigued, weary and restless, because of the way things are.

this is not what the journey is meant to be like. no no no...

discipleship is a journey that moves us from duty to delight :D
the point is not about fulfilling the duty, or the fruits of our labour, or anything of that sort, but simply to enjoy and experience God through it.

the reason why God asks us to do things like worship Him, obey Him, meditate on His word; is simply so that we can draw close to Him. to know Him and to enjoy Him.

i know it isn't as easy as it sounds. really, it isn't. but it's something we must learn to do because if we don't we'll just end up like pharisees and saducees, all legalistic and rigid, not knowing God but just following rules all out of obligation. this is not how our lives are meant to be. not when God has already paid the ransom for our lives so that we may be called children of God!

that takes us to understanding who we are in Christ. we are God's children.

Ephesians 5:1-2
Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

i don't remember what version Ps Keith read from, but the part where we are God's children came before being imitators of Christ. but anyway, the meaning is still the same.

therefore, as dearly beloved children, be imitators of Christ. (i did a little switcheroo there) we need to know that our identity is in God, we need to know it inside first and then our behaviour will confirm our identity.

it's not, do a lot of good things like go to church, do charity, give to the poor, etc. and then only you'll be a child of God. no no no. it's not that way.

it's us being God's beloved children then showing it through our actions in love.

get? :)

i was really encouraged by that. because at times, i just feel that i need to prove myself and do things to please others. or just do things because that's what i'm "supposed" to do.

i am a child of God and He loves me to bits! and i am God's beloved.
and because He loves me, i want to love Him back by living my life for Him. doing the things i do for Him and not for anyone else, not even for myself.

and that was the message for the night.

Father Lord,
thank you for loving me. thank you for calling me your child. thank you for calling me your beloved.
thank you for being my father who watches over me and who forgives me no matter how many times i mess up.
teach me Lord to delight in you.
teach me to live my life for you and to enjoy it.
help me not to do things out of obligations or rules or duties, but teach me to enjoy doing them.
i love you, Father.

everyday is a new day :)

hello marshmallow :)

it's been super duper long since i've last blogged. well, not like i'm very consistent either. and i just realized that i blog like once a month. but anyway, so much has been happening lately.

the things God is doing and is going to do is simply indescribable and exciting! He has so much install for our country, our churches, our cf, our schools, our lives.

we've had 40 day prayer and fast and also Petaling Jaya Prayer Day (PJPD) with the objective to come together and pray for our nation. it is really exciting. we must start rising up in prayer.

but in the midst of all that excitement, there have been times where i've felt so discouraged and sometimes anxious (don't really know why). anxious in the sense that sometimes i wake up suddenly with my heart beating so fast and a sick feeling in it. i really do not know why. but God has been a source of encouragement and my assurance.

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
Psalm 143:8

everyday, i have hope in the love of God :) and so do you!

Dear Lord,
Thank You for the hope You give us every day.
Thank You for Your unfailing love.
Thank You for the assurance that You are watching over us.
I love You, Lord so much.

but as for me, i will trust in You

life has been quite a struggle. but it has been a struggle where i know i'm not alone, but where i am assured that God is with me.

life in form 6 is pretty crazy, especially for someone like me. whose time management skills is super bad. help me, Lord.

but of course life is not all that bad. yeah, i may be struggling at the moment, but one thing i've learnt through the struggles i've been through in my life is that in those times of desperation, God is so real and that there is never a situation that's too big for Him to bring us through. such a wonderful hope, yes?

2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

God's grace IS enough for me. He is all that i need. :)

back to the blessings He has given to me throughout these past weeks, one of the biggest things that God brought me through to remind me how there is so much more to life than just my own and my own plans, God has a super BIG BIG BIG picture than what our human minds could ever imagine!! He did this during the Malaysian Youth Prayer Gathering on the 19th July 2008 in Kluang, Johor. it was exciting to see youths from all the states in Malaysia come together to pray for our country and i was so humbled to see how God can use the small town churches and youths to be part of His BIG plan for the nation, for the world, for people! God is doing such a great thing in Malaysia and it's really exciting. i really don't want to miss out on it because i was too caught up with Form 6 or something like that. i want to be part of His plans and i want to live my life for Him! and we must must pray for our land, Malaysia.

1 Timothy 2:1-2
I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone–for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.

then there was Netball Inter-house Games. played for green house. and we got second. pretty alright i guess, since we had like TWO practices only!! we've always been getting second to purple since forever! oh well. but it was super duperly fun to play netball again though i think i'm really bad at it already due to the lack of training and extra weight :( tsktsk. and i got to see lots of lifoong as she came back to refree. i miss that girl super much!

2nd August, Saturday was the National BK Quiz. One of the reasons why i was running around so much before this. it was fun and i super praise and thank God for providing the people who served and helped out. by God's grace and providence it all went well. :) praise God!

i went for Passion Kuala Lumpur on the 3rd of August! and it was good. it was pretty evangelical i must say. but it was a good reminder to the purpose of our lives here, that is to shout God's fame! the worship that night was powerful and refreshing. met loads of christian friends there too.

Greater things have yet to come
Greater things are still to be done in this city
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things have still to be done here

and then the other happy thing is that i passed my driving test!! cleanly :) praise the Lord!!

there's loads more to thank God for. but i should get going now. lots of stuff to do. i am struggling quite a bit in my studies.

Dear Lord,
thank you for being by my side always and for the strength and grace you provide each day. i need you so so so much. and i love you :)

But as for me, I trust in You.
Psalm 55:23